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Tuesday, July 11, 2006
I gotta let me know, should I stay or should I go

I’ve had different conversations with different people about what to do in the future. Is the current job the best? Is the current country the best option? Should one stay, focus on what’s going on now, or simply leave, change everything and try a different career?

It’s a phase we all go through periodically. That day when a question hits you: where is your life going? You start asking yourself if you are on the right track, which are your options, in any direction…

I see friends of mine struggling to get an answer, find a way. I am still safe, have two faculties that need finishing, a masters program that has to be started and completed in the future 3 years, foreign languages I am determined to learn, long term plans I need to stick to. So the job option is a little easy, as I need shifts and a good salary, which let’s say is not getting on my nerves at this time.

However, I such as others, do get tired and frustrated because of bad policies, behaviors that I find unfair, things not moving, and the pressure of having more options becomes higher. But if you have changed jobs once or twice, finding a new one does not seem so evil. You get picky and moody, but you are somehow also a bit cured of the greener grass concept.

Yes, this concept is what drives us, the hope of better something. To this hope we can sacrifice our worm steady place, our no big worries life. A way of getting something new done, of achieving more, of heading to that golden path that we can grasp in the mist.

Leaving the country, working someplace else. For a few months, a few years…A lot of people choose that. Sim moved to Spain, Mon is heading to Canada, Ali is working and leaving in Mozambique, Cristina has been in the US for 2 years now, Mishu is spending the summer working there, my aunt has been in Italy for almost a year, K is here in Romania, along with other foreigner thinking our country is the land of all opportunities.

I for one, due to my ability of adapting to almost any place and any situation and due to probably one half of a gene that is Roman, I follow a very wise statement: Patria ubi bene! So the talk about missing your country, green grass, job security is a bit overrated for me. I believe in judging things by their benefits, obvious and marginal ones. Choose the job that suits you better, the country that better fits your needs…

You miss your family? They are one flight away, one phone call away, one email or letter away! I know people who leave in Romania and see their family once or twice a year because of distance, lack of time and other impediments. But tell that same group of people to move to a different country for a new job, part of them would say they’d miss their family too much.

I also know people who hate their jobs and would never leave them in hope of better something in the future and people who love their jobs but keep an eye open, because you never know!

Maybe the best way is to focus on what you do and where you are, but not ignore other options. Have a clear view of them all and do your best to choose wisely.

Tags: Careers, Overseas Jobs, Life Choices

posted by Alina @ 9:01 AM  
  • At 7/11/2006 3:26 PM, Blogger Sim said…

    It's not as easy as it seems. You go away, thinking that it will be ok, that you will do just fine and then you find yourself at night alone, independently of who you are with, because there are things to be discussed with certain people and when those persons are not around, you are not ok. I guess that it will be fine in the end, when I will meet more people and get used to living in this country... but until then... Internet and stuff.

  • At 7/11/2006 8:26 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Well, Sim, I'll try to be around as much as I can. Oh, yeah, and we have webcam for emergency support, Sunshine :D

    I imagine it is hard now, but I am sure in a few months you will get to feel like home.

  • At 7/11/2006 9:39 PM, Anonymous cornelia said…

    I once had everything well planed - what job I am going to have, that at 20 I would already play the piano, what my life would exactly be ... then everything just turned around, I could not direct anything anymore and the funny thing is that I am happy with the present, even if it is do faraway from my reality ...

    We all have our dreams of us, of life, of reality and we all have to have a plan, have to think – ‘where am I going to be in the next few years?’ …

    It is not like I do not have a plan anymore, I just learned to take the best from the present and to adjust the future accordingly.

  • At 7/11/2006 9:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hello Sim! I can understand at first it feels bad when you find yourself all alone in a place full of strangers. But for sure you will addapt to the new life, in a few months. And as you said, long live Internet (we can talk on Yahoo :) or you can login to BD chat :))

    Related to the other 'issue', when I was little I dreamed of settling in US. In the last years I changed my opinion and I try to find the good parts of living in my country. Trying to be positive thinking it will get better and who knows, maybe it will :).

  • At 7/14/2006 3:43 PM, Blogger Muhammad EL-Ashry said…


    nice post

    I like it

  • At 7/15/2006 2:01 PM, Blogger loloma said…

    I guess it's different for each person, but for me the reality of living in a foreign country was never that easy. And I know sometimes it can take more than a few months to adapt... Chances are that some people never adapt and they eventually have to return home. I guess it depends not only on a person's character, but also on the circumstances in which you left home, what you are doing in the foreign country, etc. I've been surrounded by a lot of expats during the last six years and I can tell you it's never as easy as it seems. For some people it's worth it, for some it's not.

  • At 7/15/2006 8:59 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Cornelia, I think it's quite important to choose the middle way between too little and too much planning! It keeps you kind of sane :D

    Cris, I guess dreams change over the years. The country I wanted to run away to when I was little was India, then wanted to go to Japan to learn karate...:D Now I just want the country that best suits the moment. And for the time being that is still Romania.

    Muhammad, glad you've enjoyed it!

    Loloma, I agree it depends on the circumstances and more over on the people you meet, the things you share. I agree it is not half as easy as it seems, but that seems to be the attribute of life no matter where you actually live it.

  • At 7/16/2006 5:51 PM, Blogger Ali la Loca said…

    Alina -

    As someone who has traveled and moved almost her entire life, it is actually really hard for me to have any perspective on this topic. It is just the way I live, bouncing from place to place, with surprisingly little planning.

    I just get these feelings, intuition, whatever - and I know that it is time for me to move on. I knew 2 years ago that I would move to Portuguese-speaking Africa but didn't know a single person here. Then it happened, everything came together, and now I'm here.

    There are definitely downsides, but I don't know if I can live life any other way...

  • At 7/16/2006 8:30 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Ali, each chooses their own path. At a certain time, you simply decide it is time to go. I also wanted to leave everything here and move to Egypt a year ago, but then K and my new job and university happened, and all started to have a meaning here.

    I guess the trick is to learn to trust the inner voices showing you the correct path.

  • At 7/23/2006 5:27 PM, Blogger Owzyo! said…

    I don't know if you've decided to go walkabout - I sort of did, if not very far to Manchester, but I knew no one when I came here. It was tough at times, but I think worth it... But maybe go somewhere that you have a contact? It'll make it a bit easier.
    If you fancy Manchester let me know!

  • At 7/23/2006 6:37 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Owz, I am not planning to move till I finish school, at least not from the country. But if I ever decide to come to Manchester, even for a few days, I promise to let you know! :)

  • At 7/24/2006 1:07 AM, Blogger Monica R said…

    Hi Alina,

    Finally get to read your blog again and again... the stupid IT -s from work have forbidden the accss to some websites... and our blogs ar between th ones banned. :-(((... so.. now I got to another internet source...and here it is ...
    I miss please call me back or at least send me an email..



  • At 7/24/2006 7:46 AM, Blogger Alina said…

    Hey Mon, nice to see you back around here! Will email at this time, cause it is a bit early and will then call you later today :D

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Name: Alina
Home: Bucharest, Bucharest, Romania
About Me: "This is my church. This is where I heal my hurts". It's also where I feel free and my preferred means of expression.
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