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Monday, March 19, 2007
Reasons why I think God hates me
Some of you might argue I am really not that important. Who am I to deserve so much direct attention? Well, I prefer this vision right now and you cannot convince me of anything else. I will go back to better feelings on my own, in a few days. So the list of reasons:
  1. Everybody around me seems to be speaking Turkish. If not, every place selling food has to have something to do with Turkish cuisine.
  2. Everybody is a fan of Turkish music. When they are standing next to me, with the music turned loud enough for me to hear.
  3. Funny photos sent on company jokes lists have to come from Turkish websites.
  4. When I actually started feeling a lot better, my computer froze, crashed, and then never loaded Windows again. No safe mode, no Ubuntu live CD (which I just so happened to have in my bag), no nothing.
  5. There are two months left until the next license exam and I have no computer.
  6. All my data, files, photos, music is lost. I have some on CDs and DVDs but of course I can't find the right ones.
  7. One of my favorite necklaces from my mom got broken this morning. I did it actually.
  8. All the men I ever meet are seriously weird, troubled, crazy, heartless or all of these at the same time. Or he is D/A, who falls into an entirely different category in which he is quite alone, as he has gladly explained to me :))
  9. The exceptions to the above rule are men that are taken or not my type at all.
Reasons why I think God loves me, although He has a really weird way of showing it:
  1. My friends who either are great at putting up with me or are depressed at the same time, so we all concentrate on making the other one feel better
  2. My parents, especially my mom.
  3. Cherry Mocha from Gregory's.
  4. The beautiful weather outside that makes me smile no matter what.
  5. Silviana's computer that can save me when it comes to current school projects.
  6. The fact that I am chronically optimistic and I still think it's all gonna be just fine.
  7. Except for some issues that can be easily handled, I am quite healthy.
That's it, a list that had to be made.
posted by Alina @ 12:11 PM  
  • At 3/19/2007 12:40 PM, Blogger Cristina Banu said…

    Cool list. About the Turkish stuff around you, I think you are a bit exagerating. I mean for example everyday I see help and error lines in German, I hear some German words, my colleagues talk about German ppl, they also listen to some German songs and so on. Therefore these small coincidences don't mean a thing. The conclusion is to keep up the good work (optimism included here) and I hope someone will repair your computer soon. Good luck with your work for the diploma.

  • At 3/19/2007 1:48 PM, Anonymous Mihaela Lica said…

    So you live in Bucharest? I really miss it, you know. I was born there.
    Turkish? What's wrong with that? Do you like "sarmale"? Yeah, Turkish. Baclava? Yeah... Well, much of the traditional Romanian food has Turkish influence. Even the traditional music… There’s nothing wrong with that. You have to accept it as a part of your life and erase it from the list. God doesn’t hate you… He simply loves the Turks as well. And in my opinion they have a great culture (different, but amazing). They know how to sell. No wonder they seem to conquer all the markets pretty fast. In Germany (where I live) I deal with the same phenomenon. But it doesn’t bother me.
    What should really bother you is the “manele” movement. If we compare… Turkish music is really better! At least it has some cultural background and it is not kitsch.
    I am sure you’ll come to my conclusion in a day or two: it’s not fair to say God “hates” you. Hate is a strong word and it doesn’t do justice to the small accidents that happened in your life (those from the list). The men… well, I know what you mean but I think that God has other plans for you and he is keeping the right one for the right time. The data loss? Backup! Don’t blame God for something you should do from time to time.
    Just keep on smiling, no matter what. Erase the “hate” concept from your life. Hate will never bring something good.
    And remember: YOU ARE THAT IMPORTANT. You deserve so much attention.
    Why? You’ve touched my heart (I was reading a few entries of yours today) and you are a giver. This makes you an incredibly special person. How many givers do you know? How many people so open and honest to share their worries and happiness as you did?
    PS… I’d add writing to the reasons why God loves you. This is a gift and you are really talented.

  • At 3/19/2007 2:06 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Wife, you forgot to add something. Your current bf is German, not your ex:D

    Mihaela, thanks so much for your comment. I have nothing against Turkish people, their culture, their cuisine or their music. I so happen to love them all and Istanbul is for now my favorite city in the world. So why it bothers me that much these days: well, I should mention to you that my ex boyfriend is also Turkish :P Now I am sure you get it.

  • At 3/19/2007 2:18 PM, Anonymous Mihaela Lica said…

    Well, this is my fault... It really sounded like Turkish bothers you. Now I see: you hurt. A normal feeling. Sad, but true. Don't worry, Alina! Everything will be just fine. Promisse. I've been there, done that. ;)I'm there again... Latino music is for me the pain. But it also renders me happy. Salsa is my Heaven and my Hell... Now I really understand you!
    What have I told you about you touching my heart? Now the connection is even deeper!

  • At 3/19/2007 3:30 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Mihaela, I also think I understand you perfectly :) Salsa? That sounds great. I always wanted to learn it. And samba. and more :)

  • At 3/19/2007 6:59 PM, Blogger Ryan said…

    These are not signs of Heaven hating you, lady, but more of (so far) unsolved issues, that keep surfacing from time to time. I'd go with Mihaela's advice, keep smiling and don't loose that optimism, as some day the stars will move to your sky. :) (it's sounds so awful when translated from Romanian)

  • At 3/19/2007 7:14 PM, Blogger Alina said…

    Yes, it does sound a lot better in Romanian :) Ryan, you should now have taken me so seriously :P Besides it has to do with Grey's Anatomy (which I won't continue to see due to obvious reasons).

  • At 3/19/2007 9:36 PM, Blogger yaser said…

    feeling optimistic most of the time and thinking that every thing will turn out fine is a great thing,i always try to be optimistic about whatever situation i face it become a chronical thing as you mentioned ,however in that spirit i hope that you manage to restore the data you have lost soon and pass your exam with high grades:)

  • At 3/20/2007 12:41 AM, Blogger Grasshopper said…

    some reasons why I think God loves me...
    - my computer
    - sunny weather
    - I had no Turkish boyfriend, so the fact that I'm with you when you here / see / smell Turkish everywhere doesn't bother me
    - we found some nice - smelling tea (hope it tastes good also)

    and if you'll think I'm not a really empathic person right now... well, it's only your fault... because I took the little test (the one with famous leaders)and... guess what: it seams I like to be the toughest on the block, and i am not afraid of confrontation...

    hmmm... sounds familiar? just don't execute me for this :p

  • At 3/20/2007 1:16 AM, Anonymous RCX said…

    God hates you because people play, do, sing and eat turkish stuff? Nobody around you plays "Jaga jaga" at regular intervals on a 5.1 audio system from morning till dusk, am I right? :) (It's called the "testing" department in my company, and they seem to not have any _music_ on their hard drives).

    On the other hand, I have my whole theory about God, morality, and all that religios stuff. I have my own bible in my head. Only if I could write it down.

    On the guys part, people think I'm weird too, in a sweet kind of way :) Or maybe I just kid myself with that so I can live yet another day. (Notice how I put ME in the center of attention on YOUR blog when you write something :P)

    One thing I'm sure of: God doesn't hate anybody. That's what the Devil is for. And the Devil hates you only with God's permission (religion 101), and when God allows him to hate you, it's just a test, to see how you perform.

    And yeah, I seem to know everything, but I'm not aware of what 'everything' is yet :D

    On my list: God hates me because... I want the Devil's throne, hihi :D. God loves me so much (and doesn't need a reason to do so) that he sends me to people like you from time to time (I totally forgot where I got your blog link from, but I probably was looking for something totally different). Oh, and then he sends people like you on their way, but that doesn't mean he hates me.

  • At 3/20/2007 1:24 AM, Anonymous RCX said…

    Oh yeah, forgot one thing:


  • At 3/20/2007 10:47 AM, Blogger Alina said…

    Yaser, thanks for the advice, I am doing my best to take it :)

    Silviana, no prob, you will always have Unirea, and tea, and gregory's :D Don't you just love me now?

    RCX, I did not refer to sweet weird :D And yeah, I am used to people trying to get all the attention. :D I do live with Grasshopper and she is doing just that :P

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Name: Alina
Home: Bucharest, Bucharest, Romania
About Me: "This is my church. This is where I heal my hurts". It's also where I feel free and my preferred means of expression.
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