“Maybe I’ll change, who knows”
“I don’t think so. I think you are feeling too good about who you are right now”
“How do you know that? Maybe there’s only misery down there”
“If there were, then you would try to change something, make it better”
“Maybe I can’t…”
This dialogue did actually happen. But it might not be correctly re-written all the way, as my mind is blurry late at night and early in the morning and the conversation was in Romanian. And of course, because it was a mix of seriousness and fun making, therefore the idea, out of the context, is what’s important here.
The result was that it got me thinking. Yes, at certain times in our lives, we get trapped into a certain situation, a certain lifestyle and certain actions. The “stuck in a moment you just can’t get out of” idea. It happens to all of us. We are too used to a certain situation, we prefer to let it be instead of doing our best to get out. The eternal circles we get trapped into.
But there is still something I do not agree with. The use of the word “cannot”. I cannot help it. I can’t change it. This is who I am. I vote for “will not” here. “I am not exactly happy, but it’s not bad enough to do something about it. Or it is but I’m too lazy”. That is what I am fighting against. We are limited enough to also build additional limits that we refuse to surpass. Obstacles to stumble upon should only come from outside.
I am convinced we are the only ones with responsibilities and duties to ourselves. We have to strive to make our lives better, to go to the depths of our soul and discover what we need to make ourselves happy, to be faithful to our beliefs and our dreams. Cause otherwise, as Bart said once, no one else will.
All that said, I am never cease to be amazed by how people learn to love their misery, their unhappiness. Yes, what is yours is different and special, your problems are the most important ones just because they are yours. Still, don’t get attached to what does not make you ultimately happy. There are a lot of things to be keen on. Why choose the ones that harm you.